"The Great Gobbler Staredown" featuring Janine Sikes and Tom Turkey

Friday, July 13, 2012: Another day of seeing what the countryside has to offer. First we are off to see the dam located on the Flathead River, that together with the Swan River,forms Flathead Lake. There is a path to a viewing site where you can partially see the dam and the river far below. However, to get the most advantageous view you have to walk down a flight of four hundred and fifty steps, then return up the same daunting number. Three of us decided the restricted view was adequate but not Janine, nooo! she went all the way to the bottom. Eventually reappearing at the top, she was hardly out of breath. And within, say 30 minutes, she could actually speak in whole sentences instead of gasping about what a long way down, and back up, it was. We were temporarily disorientated (meaning lost) while trying to locate the National Bison Range, Janine was driving, Dave was navigating, Jeannie was trying to help and I was fulfilling my role as the resident curmudgeon. After wandering the backroads of Montana for eons, (actually a few ninutes) we finally emerged on a major highway, the GPS and Dave found us and we were back on track. Keep in mind what a large widerness area we are in and the number of backroads, mostly dirt or gravel, criss-crossing ranches and farms that seem to go on forever. So Dave and his GPS had their work cut out for them. Why even, old Dan'l Boone would have envied his path finding skills. Our trip through the Range made for an interesting afternoon. There is a narrow, one-way loop along a monutainous road. The sign says it requires two and one half hours to complete and it do, yes indeed it do. Within the first mile we saw three bison rolling in a dusty area, the purpose of their wallowing in the sand is to coat their bodies with dirt and thus ward off insects. For the next hour and a half we saw a ton of beautiful scenery but not much else. There was some good natured grumbling about the lack of bison in the Bison National Range. The last two miles of the loop were an entirely different story. We came upon a small herd of buffalo and got some great pictures. (where are the pics you ask? well it is about me being techinically challenged and an IPhone that will not cooperate) but trust me, we have three cameras and lots of pictures along with video tape. Anyhow everyone has great photos of the buffalo. One large bull started coming toward the car, Dave "encouraged" Janine to move the car, and to do so quckly! I wanted to stay and face the surly beast "mano y mano" but my companions chose discretion as the better part of valor, Whew. Maybe the highlight of the swing through the Range was our sighting of two large bull elk. Native Americans call elk "Wapiti" and folks these were two whopper wapiti with huge racks. I still do not understand how they travel in the forest with antlers so immense. Back in civilization, or Polson, Montana, we stopped for dinner. After talking about various places to eat, Janine suggested a Mexican place on the shores of Flathead Lake. Good choice Janine! We ate on their outside deck overloking the marina and lake. Food was excellent and the scenery was even better. Rumor has it the margueritas were wonderful. Following dinner, we drove back to our rental house, on the way we saw a ton of deer and a bear. The bear had knocked over several trash cans and was calmly eating dinner. The bear's attitude seemed to be, tourists be damned, there is garbage to plunder and trash to pillage. When we reached the house, Janine retired to the deck for some much needed rest, thus began the "Fowl Follies." Janine was out on the deck in a reclining chair relaxing and possibly dozing, she said she suddenly felt as if someone or something was watching her. She looked at the lake, no boats, looked to her right, more empty lake, she glanced left and saw "Tom Turkey" a wild turkey had came up the stairs and was on the deck peering at her. Janine stared back, unafraid, facing down the bodacious bird. She said her mind strayed to the thoughts of an early Thanksgiving dinner, possibley this very Sunday. Suddenly the bird, sensing his possible demise, beat a hasty retreat, thus ending another tense confrontation not unlike that in the classic western movie, "High Noon." I can just see the local headlines "Fierce fowls fear female fatale of Flathead." Film at eleven. Warning! Some content may be unsuitable for younger viewers.